GCW Joey Janela’s Spring Break 7 2023 Review
Joey Janela’s Spring Break is always an odd collection of matches, each year having its own theme and niche. This year it seems to be taking the bold approach of attempting… an actually appealing-looking wrestling card. On a weekend of gimmick shows, that’s not a bad thing! Especially with matches like Vikingo vs Mike Bailey, this has the potential to be a standout card of the weekend. Let’s see how it goes!
Match #1 – Komander vs. Gringo Loco vs. Billie Starkz vs. Alec Price vs. Tony Deppen vs. Shane Mercer vs. Cole Radrick vs. Jack Cartwheel vs. Blake Christian - Doors, Ladders, Chairs Match
Astounding that Komander is only a couple of hours removed from his Match of the Weekend contender against Vikingo and is here in a multiman car crash match.
Deppen and Christian bring some great shade to the light as slimy heels, trading underhanded tactics. Gringo Loco, Cartwheel and Komader stand out as the best contributors to the ocean of highspots. Mercer’s moonsault slam from the top of the ladder onto Cartwheel was spectacular (but also safe - looking at you, ROH ladder match).
Blake Christian steals the win after sitting in the crowd for most of the match to avoid damage, hitting a disgusting-looking curb stomp on Billie Starkz, who was in the midst of pinning Cole Radrick.
4 stars – A great way to do a super fun opening scramble match, with the right person getting the win.
Match #2 – The Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley & Chris Sabin) vs. The East West Express (Jordan Oliver & Nick Wayne) - GCW Tag Team Championships
East West Express is the perfect use of these guys - Nick Wayne is still 17 and needs some development time and Jordan Oliver has developed greatly since his flop of a singles run, and is the perfect fit for the role of ‘second guy in a tag team’.
MCMG have also developed into a more grounded veteran heel team which is a nice counterpoint to the speed and flash of East West Express. Nick Wayne’s face gets busted up something nasty and is spilling blood early on in this one.
Everything looked crisp and vicious, with MCMG relying on tag moves that take advantage of their cunning and experience rather than their speed (where they would be outmatched). Everything looks crisp and vicious.
East West Express gets the win here and it’s well-deserved after a good showing all weekend.
3.25 stars – An above-average tag match between the past and the future.
Match #3 – Mike Bailey vs. El Hijo del Vikingo
The two best wrestlers of the weekend (and the world) going up against each other was always going be a marquee match of any show it happened to fall on. Vikingo is also coming from the incredible match at Supercard of Honor a few hours earlier.
This started a bit sloppy and slow from both guys - who look to be absolutely wiped after a few days of back-to-back bookings. It picks up at the halfway point, but it’s clear they’re making the most of what they have left rather than it being a showcase of their best efforts.
An Ultima Weapon onto the apron misses and results in Vikingo hitting a nasty diving Destroyer to the apron. An avalanche Meteor Rain gets a nearfall for Bailey but Vikingo pulls out the win with the avalanche spinning uranage followed up by the 630.
4 stars – Two of the best, who have nothing left in the gas tank, make it work.
Match #4 – BUSSY (Allie Katch & Effy) vs. Maki Death Kill (Maki Itoh & Nick Gage)
Laying my card on the table - Katch and Effy do nothing for me, Itoh does nothing for me, and Gage really does nothing for me.
If these wrestlers are your cup of tea, great. Check this match out. But for my preferences? Nah man. This can hit the bricks. Four twitter wrestlers who forget you actually have to do something once the bell rings.
This was slow and relied completely on smoke and mirrors, dumb gimmicks, and bad injokes.
This ended with a MDK getting a double pin on BUSSY in a match that went about 15 minutes too long.
1 star – This only exists in the hopes that it becomes a viral gif on Twitter. Skip.
Match #5 - Steph DeLander vs Masha Slamovich - GCW World Championship
This comes from Matt Cardona and DeLander attacking MDK after the previous match.
This was not good. Slamovich is a good worker but Steph is severely limited, and has been ever since her days back in Australia. This was slow, plodding, and half of the moves weren’t even performed correctly. Slamovich picks up the win via the sleeper on Steph after outside interference.
1.5 stars – More of an angle than a match, and a bad one at that.
Match #6 – Joey Janela vs Kota Ibushi
This was a great return showing of Ibushi, hitting all the big spots (e.g. triangle moonsault) and showing he’s fit and healthy again (like the deadlift powerbomb).
Joey has a tendency to milk the match, slow it down, and go too long in these spots - not unlike he did against Endo in DDT the prior day. This was unfortunately the case here, where the individual spots were great, but the pacing felt lethargic at best.
Janela does a Muta-esque bladejob after hitting his skull on the turnbuckle, and it adds a bit of drama to a match that was fatiguing. Speaking of fatigue, both guys launch too early on a deadlift avalanche German Suplex to the floor (intending to go through some doors but missing) and look like they crack their skulls on the hard ground.
Ibushi gets the win with the Kamigoye for a feel-good return in a too-long match where too little happened.
3 stars – An above average match that fell to its timeslot at the end of a marathon day.
AVERAGE RATING: 2.79 of 5 stars (or 5.58 of 10)
SUMMARY: Unfortunately this was a bit of a disappointing show. Outside of the opening ladder match, there’s nothing that’s particularly essential to watch. The bigger issue is that the show no longer has the vibes of a Janela Spring Break, and instead just feels like any other show in the rotation. A shame.
WATCH THE SHOW HERE: FITE
